That is what the personal statement is all about right? It depends, I get these requests all the time, and I always have to respond that, unless they want me to make up something fictional that has nothing to do with them, they need to provide me sufficient info and the right type of info to support a well-written statement. Whatever I write will obviously be written well enough to get you in; but if it's about something totally routine and common and/or something they hear 100 x/day (like "I always liked science and I enjoy helping people and I realized how rewarding this is by caring for my grandmother; so I want to work in medicine...") It's not unique. Likewise, at least half the time, these clients give me a draft like yours, explaining why your grades might no be a strong as they could be and, essentially, making excuses about why you standard data (i.e. grades and aptitude testing scores) weren't particularly great. Those kinds of essays might not necessarily hurt your chances; but they definitely won't help your changes either. There's no formula: you could write a great personal statement about why you want to study chemistry (unless you can support it with your projects and comments from your Chem advisor, etc, or about having had to work for your parents for 4 or 6 or 8 hours on school nights and how you coped with that and tried not to let it destroy your grades...you could even write about your relationship with the dog you'll miss while you're away at school and what makes him so much more special than other dog owners think their dogs are. You could write a whole essay about the origin, modern application of, and intricacies of the MLB infield fly rule in conjunction with an essay about wanting to study journalism and sports science to become a sports reporter. It really doesn't matter; but if you want good results, it's got to be really about yourself or your genuine interests in an interesting way that makes it stand out from all of the other "I had to work a lot in high school, so my grades are lower than they could have been..." essays.... or "I was a candy striper in a hospital last year and now I'm inspired to become a doctor because I liked helping patients. They (literally) get stacks and stacks of those... |